Piles on the Specifics

Tabloid Headlines

Aliens take out lawsuit for unrealistic likeness

Baby panda just raised the cuteness factor        

Cats finally caught the red dot

Donkeys have now made humans the pack mule

Elephants stampede Egypt

Fashion police finally arrest Miley Cyrus and Nikki Minaj

Giraffe elected for president

Hostile mere cats wage war on Syria

Interdependent gerbils fight for the right to marry

Jack o’ lanterns are now national delicacy

Kangaroos now host Good Morning America

Lions eat ISIS

Monkey kingdom raids Time Square

Nocturnal penguins found in underground layer

Ostrich now mayor New York

Prince William cheats on new wife with gorilla

Queen of Hearts beheaded for animal abuse

Rabbits invade England

Snails plead guilty to disappearance of salt

Tigers claim France

Underground world found through volcano

Vampires caught applying glitter to bodies before going on TV

Whale marries Obama

Xerox has made a comeback

Yonder was declared an official location

Zebra’s terrorize San Francisco